Rock Bottom

Many of us know what it feels like to hit that all time low. It's desperate  sad, and just downright awful. Today I witnessed a man hitting rock bottom. I'm not sure if he was aware of it, but as an outsider looking in... I'd say it was a pretty desperate moment. 


Many people may not know this, but the food in snack machines does indeed go bad. When this happens, the guy who stocks the machines puts the expired food on top of the machine. The food is still "good" for the most part. So, as a passerby, sometimes I'll grab some chips. That's what most people do. 
However, the janitor had something else in mind. Today the janitor, that greedy man, starts filling up his cleaning cart with snacks. Not only did he take the ones in reach, but he desperately grabbed at the ones in the back. When he couldn't reach those, he took out his broom and scraped the snacks towards him from the top of the machine.  
I think this would accurately be my all time low if I were him. How many expired snacks does one need? 

While blurry, it still gets the point across

The custodian then proceeded to steal snacks out to some of the ladies who work at the convenience store like some sort of messiah who brings trans fat goodness to all. 


Lesson to be learned: grab those snacks before the greedy custodian dude. 


I want you to think of my blog when you pass a snack machine now! 


~xoxoxo Britt<3

Irrelevant Mice

So, this irrelevant, but I thought I'd share with you guys something adorable. We apparently had to confiscate some mice, so they stayed in the office for a little bit. Boy, were they cute! So, naturally, I took video.


I named this one Fivel. He was precious. 

I hope you love him!


~xoxoxo Britt<3

The Protocol You Should Know About

Hello folks! I'm glad to say that I'm surviving classes and such. I stay busy but I have crazy things that happen to me.  So, I am glad to tell you about the creepiest experience ever. Well... not really EVER, but on the scale of a normal lazy day basis, it was pretty creepy. 


The day seemed normal, and I needed a shower. Showers are normally awesome for me. I like feeling clean and it can be stress relieving. However, after I stepped into my shower and started wetting my hair, I noticed something lurking in the corner. 

Seemingly harmless..... 

Yeah, it was a freaking spider. So, since I had to deal with that crazy situation, I have advice for those who may experience it! Some may say I'm silly, but I'm just protecting you from letting a spider rape your naked body of life while you're just trying to get clean. 

1. Constant Eye(s) Contact. 

First off, I'm not really sure how many eyes spiders have... but I've found if you DON'T WANT TO DIE, keep staring at it. This may not be true, but it will alert you if it moves. By constantly watching it, you won't be so vulnerable, and your reflexes will be much faster if it does go in for the kill. 


2. Shampoo With Caution
While shampooing and/or conditioning seems like a shower time necessity, be wary. When you're head is aimlessly placed under the shower head, you are unable to retain good focus on Mr. Spider. He'll be lurking, waiting for your vulnerable point. Shampoo will make your hair luxurious, but that spider will KILL you. So watch out! 


3. DO NOT ANTAGONIZE
You may feel the urge to risk it and attack the spider. Sure, you could kill it with a shampoo bottle or rinse it down the drain, but what if you fail??? Do you really want to risk the chance of pissing it off when you're naked and unarmed? I think not. 


Getting rid of the spider is a different story. You have a couple options for this one. 


1. MAN-UP! 
Yeah, that's right. Become a man, and beat that spider to a pulp. 


2. Get someone else to do your bidding. 
This is usually my favorite method of spider execution. If you don't mind the title of "wimp," get someone else to kill that sucker. It makes them look awesome and BA, but you ultimately get rid of your problem. 


The only thing you DON'T want to do is....
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD,
Don't ignore it. It'll make you crazy. 
Every time you shower, you'll wonder. Is it here? Did it get into my bedroom? Maybe it's laying eggs in my sink!!! 
Don't fall for it's innocent facade. Kill it.

KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!!

I'm hoping that from now on I won't have to deal with that crap. Related to the Avatar reference, I got a new fish. His name is Sokka. He loves all of you. 

I love you too, have a nice week!!!


~xoxoxo Britt<3

I am a sad panda.

Yes, I am a sad panda. Why, you ask? Well, the reason is simple. I have had training for work for two weeks, and that meant no super special awesome blog posts. It really stinks that I haven't been updating.HOWEVER, you guys have still been visiting at least, so I  was really glad to see that! 

I would like to have something new up this week, so be sure to check back for some quality entertainment. Cope  with me as I start school again, yo! 

Thanks, and much love!!! 

<3 xoxox Britt

Useless Information

Did you know that a mosquito has 47 teeth? Very odd, I know. So here is a video to make it even more peculiar. 

Word. Also the main reason I'm posting this morning is because I am in the moving process, so things are CRAZY. (However, I will argue that crazy is the best way to be ;] ) 

Due to this though, it'll be a day or so before I make a real post, which makes me feel lame. However, I'm braking my tablet back out, so you know you can expect crappily drawn pictures that amuse me! 

http://spockisnotimpressed.tumblr.com/    <<< Just so you know, since my  blog is lame today, you can get some giggles out in this one. =] 

~xoxoxo Britt<3

Come back here you swine!

I am addicted to my iPhone, and one of the greatest things about it is that you have access to all the crazy cool apps. However, I feel as though one app in particular is the devil,and have a few gripes which I must get out of my system. 


Angry Birds

Look at that butthole's smirk

Sure it's called "angry" birds because the evil green pigs steal the eggs from the birds, but I think it's called angry birds because it makes you SO pissed off when you can demolish every one of those green demons except one. 
Then, the pigs laugh at your failure. What a lousy excuse for a civil green pig. Seriously. 

Look at that fine hand crafted mahogany slingshot

That isn't my only beef with the game, though. I just want to point out that the pigs nor the birds have hands. How in the heck do these small animals make these defense structures, not to mention the freaking slingshot launching device? I want to know how any bird is going to build a slingshot like that. They can't. 

Notice how the pigs are just laughing 

For my third and final gripe, I'll just point out that this game is teaching children how to basically be kamikaze warriors. We'll just dive headfirst into the shoddy structure if it seems like it may wound just one pig. Additionally, the pigs stole like, 5 eggs. Which, not all eggs really have a 100% success rate, so what a useless waste of time trying to get them back. I understand that it's upsetting, but I almost kill that many grown birds in a matter of two levels. I really try to understand the fight against green piggy evil, but how many must die? HOW MANY MUST DIE?!?!?!


Yet, I'm still addicted.


~Britt<3 xoxoxo

HARRY FREAKIN' POTTER!

I have been super busy, but I thought that I'd have to stop by here and drop a few comments about the NEW and FINAL Harry Potter film. 
First of all, the premier was AWESOME. Nerds convening in costumes to celebrate their nerd love is always fun. I went in costume, naturally... and had a lot of fun getting to see others' costumes as well. This is my favorite: 

Voldy visits a kiosk!

I posted this pic to my FB, but I know not everyone who reads this has one, so I wanted to share in the laughter. Voldemort may be evil, but he has to pick up his tickets like the rest of us. =]

The second best part of the experience was getting to try legit butterbeer.

This drink is too legit to quit

To be honest, it really tasted a lot like chai with apples. I'm sure it varied from place to place, but pretty good stuff. 

Also, as far as the movie went. It was awesome, but had it's VERY great moments like:

This is where, in my mind I reenact the Potter Puppet Pals Scene....
Voldy: Give me a hug Draco
Draco: I don't want a hug
Voldy: HUGGINGGGG
Draco: I'll wound you!!! 


But yes, awkward hugs are awkward. This made me laugh so much in the movie. I'm also very glad I found access to this pic. I found it Here> http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/voldemort+hugs+draco


I was pretty tickled to find it and am glad I can watch the awkward over and over and over. 
Hopefully more humor will come soon! 


~xoxoxo Britt<3